Ramblings 07 Apr 2008 11:46 am
Hey Neighbor.
Dear Neighbor,
How are things? Good, good. Let me ask you something. Why are you doing laundry at 3:30 in the morning? What could you possibly have soiled that could not wait until daylight breaks? Was it an inebriated evening of indiscression that needed immediate cleansing? Did you forget about a job interview in the morning and your lucky pair of underwear was a little ripe? Imagine my surprise when I woke and heard this odd clanking and thumping. Initially I thought it might have been someone in my apartement. I know, that is a terrifying thought isn’t it? So you can imagine my annoyance when I realized it was the dryer running. Did you know that it is in the hallway right ourside my apartment and subsequentally my bedroom? Yeah it totally is. I suppose that there may have been a good excuse (though I am at a loss thinking of one). However, what there is NOT an excuse for is not checking your pockets before doing a wash. Seriously, that could be disasterous you know. Nothing ruins clothes faster than chapstick. You, however must have got your chapstick but missed the coins in your pocket. Yeah, that’s what woke me up. Your loose change was rockin’ and rollin’ around in the dryer. What did it sound like? Well, why don’t you go put some coins in your saucepan and shake it vigerously. Very vigerously. Now keep that up for an hour. There, you got it. Thankfully, I didn’t have to wait an hour. After about five minutes I couldn’t stand it so I got up and went out and stopped the dryer looking for that offensive piece of change. I located the culprit (a dime!) and then, being a considerate neighbor, turned the dryer back on. Sadly, you left more than a dime in your pocket, so I stopped it again and took out a nickel. Man, if I find a quarter and a penny maybe I can buy a stamp. I started the dryer one more time and there was still somethin clanking around so I decided that your clothes were done. They were pretty much dry anyway, so I didn’t restart the dryer. Going forward though, if you could not do your laundry between the hours of 11pm and 6am, that would be great. If you decide to make a habit of this though, I must warn you: I am a morning person and will not hesitate to start shaking coins around in a pan outside your door. Thanks for the change!
Sincerely,
Justin