Ramblings 20 Aug 2007 11:54 am
Lions and Tigers and Groping, oh my.
Friday night a group of us went over to the Hatch Shell on the Esplanade to watch the Wizard of Oz. With some blankets, pizzas and unique beverages, we were off to see the Dorothy (and her little dog too). eRock had the idea that we honor the flick by drinking Emerald City cocktails (Malibu, midori, blue curacao, sprite and sour mix) but we were out of Blue curacao so we improvised and had something just as tasty. It had been a while since I had seen the Wizard of Oz, but things haven’t changed. The wicked witch still melted, Dorothy still made it home in the end, and the Cowardly Lion was still gay. Seriously. Anyway, towards the end of the movie, right after they melt the witch (Hail Dorothy!) it started to rain on us and rather than wait to see if any of our group melted, we packed it up and left. As we approached the MGH stop, I mentioned stopping in to the Beacon Hill Pub for a beer before venturing up to Central Sq, and eventually home. Everyone seemed agreeable and we made our way over. It turns out this was a bigger mistake than that bucket of water left at the bottom of the staircase in the castle. My pint of Guinness was downright awful. In fact, all of our beers tasted downright dank, so rather than pony up for round two we made a bee line for the red line with The Field as our next (and final) destination.
This is where I stop and congratulate Pres. Meg on crossing the River and venturing further from Southie than she has been in months. Congrats.
Ah The Field, what a fine pint they pour. With everyone’s mood back in order we start conversing about our days and current events and generally enjoy ourselves. There is talk of when Meg almost got into a bar fight, and briefly Matt and I entertained duking it out but decided that it would be better just to finish our beers. That’s when we all collectively noticed the tonguefest happening just outside our circle. Two folks in their twenties, holding hands, standing close, and sucking face. We are not talking about a peck on the cheek or a meaningful kiss on the lips. We are talking “one wrong move and I’m going to swallow your face” kissing. It was abominable. It was gross. It was inappropriate. It was captivating, and as such we could not look away. It was like a train wreck and we couldn’t avert our eyes. Even those of us with their backs to them kept turning around to see is he had eaten her ear yet. Actually, making out in a bar isn’t the worst thing ever and it could be tolerated. What put these two into a league of their own was that he was totally “palming” her ass … while talking to their friend. Who are these people? Have they no sense for social decorum? If they weren’t asking to be the Photo of the Day before, they were practically begging for it now. I quickly grabbed E’s camera and started to instruct A-man and Meg on how I wanted them to move. I would be like Moses (with less water), parting our circle momentarily to get the shot only to have it close a second later. I was poised and ready. I was about to count off and have them move. There was anticipation and giggling. FLASH. The camera went off. The problem was that I hadn’t asked them to move yet and my opportunity was lost as more people filed into the bar and the gropers were swept out of view. Instead I got a stellar shot of Meghan’s knee. It actually worked out just fine because this story was probably more entertaining than the photo would have been alone, for now you can use your imagination. If only I had flying monkeys, then it would have been so much easier.